Why—and how—to talk to your teen and young adult about marijuana use

In a recent survey conducted by Caron, a quarter of parents said they find it acceptable to share a marijuana joint with their teen if they are 18 or older, and two in five adults said marijuana is safe for young adults to use in moderation. The remainder of those surveyed aren’t quite convinced marijuana is truly harmless to young adults. Parents are confused on this issue, and I don’t blame them. Today’s parents of teens and young adults are the first generation to face a substance that has been historically illegal but is now moving toward medicinal and legal recreational use.

With government representatives advocating for legal usage of the drug, it’s easy to assume the necessary medical aspects have been considered, but that’s not always the case. At this stage, there have not been significant clinical trials to support safe usage for people under the age of 25. In fact, research has shown that marijuana can have a detrimental impact on the development of the brain’s frontal lobe. As the brain continues to develop between the ages of 18 and 25, marijuana use can negatively affect judgment, lower IQ, and exacerbate other health concerns.

It’s also important to note that marijuana use at an early age is an important predictor of development of a substance use disorder later – the majority of those with a substance use disorder starting using marijuana before age 18 and developed their disorder by age 20. Approximately 92 percent of adolescents admitted into Caron’s young adult program indicate it as drug of choice, and at a recent high school focus group I saw students report it as their most pressing concern when it comes to drug usage among peers.

The mixed messaging on marijuana makes having a conversation about it with your teen or young adult difficult. However, the undeniable threat it poses to those under 25, coupled with the fact that it’s cheap and readily available makes it a necessary discussion.

Research shows that parents can influence their children’s decision to use substances. Here are a few general dos and don’ts to have a meaningful conversation.

While these tips set guidelines for the discussion, the conversation is going to look differently depending on the age of your child. Here are suggestions of how to have a dialogue with your young teenager, teenager, and young adult, respectively.

Ages 12 through 15
At ages 12 and 13, the transition from middle to high school catapults young teens into a high-risk time for alcohol and drugs. Sleepovers begin and supervision dwindles, making conversation key at this stage. Teens at this age will likely be introduced to experimentation with alcohol, marijuana, and nicotine products. Having these talks early on will prepare them for the moment they’re faced with these substances. Set your expectations, and lay out the consequences if they are violated. The most important part of preparation is role playing to help them to have an exit plan. For example, some parents may provide “code” phrases that allow their child to leave but saves them from having to combat peer pressure alone. A daughter that calls and says, “Please, may I stay!?” could mean: “Mom, get me out of here!” This exit plan is critical to avoid early experimentation and empower them to make healthy decisions; we know those using before age 18 are four-to-seven times more likely to develop problems with substances in the future.

Laying out these facts will help them understand choosing to use marijuana isn’t just a violation of your moral rules, it’s a major health risk with real-life consequences. There’s still a way to keep it positive --- their future is something to be excited about, and therefore, protected. At Caron, we see many college-bound young people whose lives have been disrupted due to a need for treatment. Understand your child’s risk factors and what motivates your child to stay engaged in a healthy lifestyle.

America may continue to normalize marijuana, and having age appropriate conversations can make a significant difference in your child’s understanding of the health consequences. Now is the time to educate yourself and boost your communication in an open and approachable way.